Speak to any one of my friends and they will probably tell you that I am pretty much unrecognisable from the person they met in first year. I think it's safe to say that my personal style has undergone quite the transformation over the past three years. When I first came to uni I wouldn't say I really had or even knew what a personal style was. Over the summer after first year, I went through a bit of an identity crisis.

Do you recognise this girl... because I don't!

I've always been a bit of a goth. Halloween is my favourite time of year, I wear eyeliner pretty much every day and 90% of my wardrobe is black. Whilst this has pretty much become my personal style, in first year I could not have been more different. I wore pink (?!), the only black item of clothing I owned was a pair of jeans and I had worn my docs once or twice in the whole year. Pretty much the opposite of how I dress now. When I look back to how I used to dress and how I looked it makes me laugh and I often think about why I dressed in a way that was completely not me.

I've always known I was a bit different and that how I wanted to dress didn't exactly represent what was "on trend" or in fashion. There was a time when I would wear dresses and boot wellies (which is how I think my Dr. Martens obsessions started!). I remember it being a non-school uniform day and I was laughed at the whole day, by both other kids and teachers. I was only 12 or 13 at the time and it destroyed me a little. I had never really given any thought as to how the way I dressed might look "weird" to others, it was how I wanted to dress and I liked how I looked. Throughout my teens I developed really bad self-esteem and didn't really think much of myself. If you want to read more about my issues with body confidence you can read about it here.

I mean... I can't even remember a time when my hair wasn't black. This is terrible. This is not me. 

So I'm a bit of a goth but I'm also training to be a teacher. A combination most people wouldn't put together.  You know when you look at someone and think yeah you're definitely a teacher, I could say that about 95% of my course. I kind of got it in my head that if I wanted to be a teacher, I needed to start dressing like one. I tried so hard to fit in with everyone else. I just wanted to be taken seriously and I was always worried that if I came in the kind of clothes I wanted, people would judge me. I didn't want anyone to look at me and judge my ability to teach or what I wanted to do based on how I looked or dressed. So I decided to fit in and dress like a teacher. I became so unhappy because I couldn't even recognise myself in the mirror. This wasn't me. It wasn't who I was and I felt like I was living a lie for the entire of my first year at uni.

 Over the summer, I decided that I didn't care what people thought anymore. I decided that I needed to feel comfortable in myself again and happy with how I looked. If people wanted to judge me based on how I looked then that was on them and not me. So, I dyed my hair black, sold all my pastel teacher clothes and started wearing clothes that were more me. I finally now feel comfortable with what I look like and my personal style is something I've developed over my time at uni. I do get the occasional glance from someone or a snicker or comment, but I really don't care anymore! If someone wants to judge my ability to teach children based on how I look, then I feel that just shows the kind of person they are. My personal style has nothing to do with anyone else- it's how I choose to express who I am and what I feel confident in.

I guess what I'm trying to say is developing a personal style can be hard but the trick to it is to dress for you and you alone! There is nothing worse than not feeling like yourself. One of the things I pride myself in is that I don't dress for anyone else but myself. I don't want to look like anyone else or copy any of the trends or anyone I see because I like that I'm an individual.

In a world full of "trends" and striving to be someone else I'm glad I can say I'm different. That I have an individual style. The best thing about personal style is that everyone's will be different because every person is different and why would you want to be anything else?

Till next time,
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  1. This was such a lovely read! It can be so challenging to be who you want to be in a world full of judgement and I think you're doing an amazing job. I've recently started to step up my fashion game, its been a struggle as someone plus size to really accept my body for what it is, but now that i'm starting to i look at my wardrobe in a completely new light.

    I'm glad you found your own style and feel confident enough to show it off!

    - Laura xo

    Ps. Your photography is goals!

    1. thank you so much! I feel like finding the confidence to accept yourself and dress the way you want without judgement is the bravest and scariest things anyone can do! It took me a long time to stop worrying what others thought but I am so much happier for it in the long run! I'm so glad you are embracing yourself for who you are because you are beautiful in every way!
      Love Robyn x

  2. I totally get this post. What you dress like shouldn't affect what you do. Dress for you and no one else! At the end of the day, people have fashion idols because they do something different not the same.

    The Crown Wings

  3. Wow I can't believe how different you look on your earlier photos. I'm all for people being true to themselves. Bravo on being the flamingo in the flock of pigeons! You look fantastic. I've not found my own style yet, I've always been a bit 'safe' when it comes to choosing clothes although I do love anything different. This post has inspired me to try new things xx

  4. Wow looking at the photos of you before is as if you were a totally different person! I had a goth phase in my teens, and people were telling me to "grow out of it" - but I know for myself it wasn't just a phase, I still love all things goth until now! xo

  5. I am so happy and proud of you to finally embrace your true self and and your style!
    You look amazing in the "gothic" form <3 Keep it hun darling! <3
    Kinga xx